Faded

Feeling so faded lately, and not necessarily in an exclusively bad way.

So many thoughts in my mind from the last 7 months (jeeze, already?) are coming full circle.  I’m seeing things clearly, and some people for who and what they are.  I’m out of steam.  I feel pretty beat, tired, and quiet.  But it’s good.  I welcome the feeling of defeat.

For defeat offers an opportunity to start over.  It is time for rebirth and new life to grow from these cold, old limbs.

There are hints.  Hints of life in places that are indisputably harsh, lonely, and isolated.  I can find that life inside of myself, as well.  There are signs of life in a heart that is indisputably cold.

I look forward to the emergence of life.  For the chance to take it back.  To hope — hope that I will not be diagnosed with something life changing.

Here’s to growth, and the journey home from sleep.  Here’s to opening our eyes to the warmth of sunrise.

Here’s to seeing how deeply you’ve changed, even though no one else knows it, and embracing it.  Here’s to swallowing your pride and walking away.

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